Story behind "The Saharsh Project"

It all started some 3 years back when I stumbled upon a Ted talk video by one Ms. Sunitha Krishnan who is an anti-trafficking crusader who saved over 11,000 girls from the brothels, prostitution rings and slavery across India. After watching her talk, I delved deeper into the subject, read many articles, viewed many more videos to realize that trafficking is the third biggest organized crime in terms of valuation after drugs and arms trade and in every 8 minutes, a girl is kidnapped, abducted, sold or married-to-sell in India.  Only 30% of cases are reported so we can understand the gravity of the situation. My stomach churned and throat choked at all these pieces of info but could do nothing.

Another day, another context: I took upon myself an interest to learn more about villages where my parents were born. While I couldn't get statistics of those exact villages, it came like a shocker that Warangal district in Telangana had long been a hub for human trafficking and it had been an epidemic in remote hamlets and tribal villages which mostly get unnoticed by mainstream media or administration because most of the cases go unreported.

I was first clueless when I learnt that most of the trafficking victims were those girls who dropped out of studies at around their 8th or 9th grade. I couldn't comprehend the direct correlation between dropping out from studies and getting trafficked. After some more studies and contacting few more on the ground NGOs, the picture was clear.

Lack of amenities (toilets, sanitary facilities) caused some girls to drop out after 8th or 9th grade while poverty and lack of funds to continue studies caused many other girls to drop out. On an average 9 out of 10 girls drop out before fishing 12th. Even Mid day meal, Sarva Shiksha Abhiyan schemes by government couldn't motivate girls or their parents.

This is a very vulnerable situation for a 13 or 14 year old naive girl with no education and coming from an economically poor background. She would be a victim to one of the following cases

1. Child marriage at 13-14 (This is the best and safest case)
2. Parents unwittingly get her married to a trafficker in disguise who plunges the girl into the dirty quagmire
3. Girl who doesn't have a guardian around is a susceptible target for forcible abduction
4. Girl migrates to town to work as a bonded labor or domestic help and is still vulnerable to trafficking

First Step Forward: Though we can't fight and eradicate the trafficking rackets altogether, the least we can do is to attempt to eliminate the root cause at least in some cases. That is by supporting, guiding young girls and not allowing them to drop out during that tender age. "The Saharsh Project" took it's birth from this desperate thought.

As a part of this project, our main aim was to address the twin issues of lack of school facilities and poverty among families with young girls. As a first step, we identified 3 schools to improve infrastructure and 50 kids who are above 8 years old and who lost their earning family member to whom we could support morally, emotionally and financially. "Saharsh" means 'with happiness'. We hope to bring some happiness in a handful of kids to start with.

Requesting your emotional support to the movement: I was overwhelmed when some dear friends volunteered to donate to the cause. While wholeheartedly accepting their good wishes, I had to politely refuse money because The Saharsh Project is not registered as a charity and hence can't accept monetary donations. Moreover we could pool in funds from our corporation's social responsibility arm and are self-sufficient at this point.

But we desperately require your help in two other ways. First we need volunteers, who could report to us about any girl (or a boy) who lost parents and left with no option but to drop out of school. And we need volunteers to authenticate the need and keep fraudsters at bay.

Secondly, we need volunteers who could develop friendship and foster a guiding relationship with the kids. We receive periodic progress reports, their letters, wish-lists from these kids. We would love to have any volunteers who could respond to their mails, say a few words of encouragement, provide career guidance, talk to them and motivate them in achieving their career goals so that they don't get distracted but believe we all are behind them to share their joy or pain. We would also want to drive the same point home to their parents (or guardians) as well.

We don't aim to create any revolution with this, but want to see some (if possible, all) of our girls grow up to transform into responsible, informed, self-reliant and happy women.

PS: Those who are interested in volunteering or getting associated with our initiative may feel free to add to Facebook or LinkedIn profiles that you work as a "Campaigner" at The Saharsh Project and also invite your like-minded friends,relatives and acquaintances to do the same.

My Tryst with Teaching !

"I think the teaching profession contributes more to the future of our society than any other single profession" - John Wooden

So true, yet teaching is one of the most underrated and thankless professions because every successful student believes the reason for his success was his own talent and merit whereas every failed student squarely blames his teacher or school for his failure. Or maybe that's sheer human psychology.

Teacher-student bond that's formed in very nascent stages (like around 2-3 years) is very strong. That's the age when kids' mind would be very ripe and fertile and they subconsciously yearn for knowledge, learn language and are usually curious to explore the world. A very sensitive age when they try to repeat, re-enact elders. While parents are most responsible for child's mental development, it's also the initial set of teachers who make or break a kid in that phase.

I strongly believe that a person's character, aptitude and attitude is formed based on what one learns and experiences during primary and middle school phases. That's the tender age when one needs to witness a live person demonstrating knowledge and inspiring young minds towards wisdom and ways of life. No books or internet sites can replace a sane teacher's ability to transform an innocent kid to a thinking and aspiring adolescent.

This is the age which decides if the kid would become a responsible citizen abiding by certain duties and collective consciousness or turn into a bum, thug, criminal or a terrorist. Those teachers who could ignite the imagination, creativity, awaken latent potential and inspire some hope in young minds could make a lasting impact on students' life. And those students go on to change the world around them.

What my teaching career taught me !

Personally, I didn't change the world around me but I strongly believe whatever I learnt and practiced till now is a direct result of all my teachers who taught me, inspired me, created awareness, demonstrated how to utilize the knowledge in the best interest of my career and life. Wikipedia and Google have lately occupied the stature and respect which usually teachers deserve. Reasons could be partly bad quality of teaching and equal vulnerability and naivete of students to believe what they see in internet is more accurate than what their teachers explain. I admit that I learnt a thing or two through wikipedia but my ability to grasp and extract knowledge from these internet sources was instilled by my teachers.

My tryst with the profession of teaching was accidental and least expected. After studying engineering and MBA and further working for few years in IT field, I never ever in my wildest dreams did imagine myself teaching a bunch of grown up corporates or aspiring students. I should credit the unflinching support and faith of my ex-employer who saw something in me that he wanted me to teach his students as makeshift arrangement while he was attending something more important. I initially reluctantly took the job but discovered I enjoyed the work, eventually started loving it. And it's been 7 years without looking back.

In these 7 years of teaching, I grew as a communicator, negotiator analyzer and acquired many more traits while transferring my knowledge and experience to others. I learnt that teaching is not just telling or explaining stuff but narrating an entire pretext where and how the knowledge would be used. Teaching made me a story-teller because I understood the importance of captivating the audience before I could teach a lesson or two.

While teaching subjects like project management and business analysis to experienced corporates or knowledgeable aspirants, I was expected to reach certain standards myself in terms of knowledge, posture, behavior and ability to address questions and concerns. Hence I improved my knowledge base, pronunciation, pace and diction which helped me in many other ways. Thanks to my teaching career, I got a decent hold on vocabulary (both business and technical), body-language which I could not have got it otherwise. I had to manage and lead a group of 20-30 people, set agenda, not allow the group to lose focus and drive the point home taking everyone along. This brought out some latent leadership and managerial skills out of me. 

While teaching, I had to understand individual pain points, realize that everybody was not made with same level of aptitude and hence I had to bring in variation and cater to the least common denominator. This brought out certain kind of empathy wherein I could stand in my students' shoes and judge myself. There were some situations when some very intelligent students caught me off guard which brought in humility in me thus giving a reality check to my arrogance, if any. My teaching profession made me more flexible, better decision-maker, an extrovert, a consultant and a better social person. 

I don't know how my trainees look up to my contribution in their success or enhanced knowledge, but I live with certain satisfaction that I'm a miniscule part of the bandwagon called "teachers" who strive to penetrate the knowledge forward through generations. May be this is my way of social contribution while improving, challenging, discovering and redefining myself consistently.

Happy Teachers' Day (Sep 5th) to every teacher who taught me something in life directly or indirectly, wittingly or unwittingly, through lessons or experiences or by just being around me to inspire.

Valentine's Special - 8 Stages of my Love Story

Can't believe I have known her for the last 8 years and married for almost 7 years. As I look back I realize that our love story gradually transformed from an harmless internet friendship to a long distance courtship and then to accomplished marriage to blissful parenthood. Quite a journey, it has been. A note on St.Valentine`s Day remembering and reminiscing 8 stages of love during the last 8 years.

Stage 1: Infatuation

The most beautiful stage. That strong urge to always think about her and talk to her. Those days which started and ended with her thoughts. Those late nights / early morning calls which went on forever. Those dreams to have her in my life and arms forever. Being illogically and childishly infatuated is a bliss that nobody should miss.

Stage 2: Anticipation

Next stage was anticipating and planning life together. That stage involved knowing each other`s likes and dislikes better, befriending each others` families and friends, managing and changing priorities, dreaming how our married life would be and doing everything to make those dreams come true.

Stage 3: Romance

Much anticipated stage especially after 2 years of international long distance relationship. Those sweet nothings, holding hands, long drives, candle lit dinners, listening to each other, falling head over heels all over again many times and basking in that unprecedented attention and affection.

Stage 4: Creation

Next was creating our own world. Converting 4 walls of house into home, slowly converting our dreams into reality, steadily reaching self set short term goals, building social relationships, making family friends and stabilizing our very own small world

Stage 5: Understanding & Acceptance

Surviving misunderstandings and friction caused by mutually exclusive priorities and then understanding others`points of view. This stage is about exploring some unknown and latent preferences of the better half and accepting each other as a complete package as opposite to the best front presented earlier. This in my opinion is an important stage to realize that love is much more than attraction and anticipation of living together. It`s actually accepting the love of our life with all qualities which we may not necessarily agree with. This is when true love begins.

Stage 6: Complementing

Complementing each other (mind it, it`s complementing not complimenting) worked like a cement for foundation. After realizing each other`s positive and negative areas, the success of marriage is directly proportional to how they support, supplement and complement each other thus locking the perfect relationship and concealing the other from fear of failure or any apprehension.

Stage 7: Pride

Then came the light of our life to teach us purpose to live. Our son, our baby. He came, he saw and he conquered our senses in such a way that our world turned upside down for good. He has been making us beam in pride. We as parents grew together, learnt parenthood, discovered how to create and nurture love in a tiny being. We are basking in the glory of shaping an attitude, behavior of a 'person' from inception. Wow, we feel so important !

Stage 8: Complete 

Now this is a stage when we no longer have to express or tell how much we love each other in any way. Mutual feelings are understood, told, perceived and acted upon without any need of words or gestures. Love is appended by great levels of comfort level, understanding, respect, importance and security.

Love is in the air. It`s everywhere. Happy Valentine`s Day

PS 1: Don't bother about those who dissuade you from celebrating Valentine`s Day. We need reasons, logic, rationale to avoid days to hate, not love. We just need a reason and excuse to celebrate and express love. Nobody loses anything through expression of love.

PS 2: बुरी नज़र वाले तेरा मुह काला 

Bucket List - As of Mayan Apocalypse 2012

It's already Dec 19, 2012 and the world is supposed to end in another couple of days as per Mayan calendar; If we keep all logic, reasoning, rationalism beside, it's fun to be prepared for the doomsday and recollect, remember all those unfulfilled wishes without experiencing which, we may pass away.

Here is the list of those unfulfilled wishes, I would've wanted to achieve, experience or see before I die;

My Bucket List:

1. Base jump from the waterfall cliff. I was so excited to see videos of base jump from the cliff of Angel Falls that I always dreamt of doing one, but sadly couldn't even find a right time and opportunity for bungee.
2. Visiting Iguazu Falls on the border of Brazil and Argentina. We almost planned for the trip but had to call off due to other developments.
3. A trip with my parents and entire family. A cruise trip to Bahamas / Alaska or train trip in continental Europe.
4. Participating in an active political campaign on a national level (either in India or Canada). I have nurtured an undying passion for psephology and implementation of marketing in politics.
5. Making a presentation / talk on TED conference. My favorite topic would be international business leadership or strategic management. But first I should work to deserve an invite from TED
6. Presenting a 2 hour guest lecture at IPE (where I've done my MBA). I was in awe of guests speakers who presented their success stories. I dreamt of taking over the podium someday. I just wish I reach the stage wherein I can narrate my story to budding managers.
7. Establishing operational offices of my venture in all continents of the globe (except Antarctica, of course).
8. Owning a reasonably comfortable independent house with front lawn, backyard, all amenities in Hyderabad.
9. Training, nurturing and guiding atleast 5 passionate youngsters into services or knowledge based entrepreneurship. This is my idea of social contribution by creation of wealth, jobs through knowledge as investment.
10. Having my own little angel girl and seeing her play with my bunty boy. 

Why 2012 is special for me !

2012, for me, will be an year to remember, cherish and treasure forever in my life. My personal life, social life, professional life - all went through a 180 degree overhaul and I was too busy experiencing life in it's real terms. The year started with never before anticipation of yet-to-be-born, then the big event - birth of my son, then immersing myself in and being in a trance / ecstasy called fatherhood. No one could ever explain the joy of having a baby and neither can I. It's only to be experienced and felt.

When a little man, who is born with my blood, genes and love looks into my eyes, smiles and stretches his hands asking me to take him in my arms - I feel I have the entire world in my hands. Every moment I spent with my son has been special for me and I just wish he remains in my arms forever..Love has a new definition for me now.

Another important milestone for me and my wife was that we completed our 5 years of journey together. 5 years of marriage, togetherness, sharing, caring and love. I have seen the metamorphosis of the feeling called love and care. Earlier it was sweet nothings, longing to meet, talk, spend time together. But as the marital life progressed, we realized that love is much more than that, it's growing old together, learning from each other, sharing each other's good times, shielding each other from bad times, being an unflinching support to each other, being a shoulder to lean on, taking pride in each other, being happy just because the other person is happy, experiencing minute gestures which needed no words - that's marital life and IT HAS BEEN FAB.

She is one person who has been extremely proud of me and always felt I'm the best in the way I'm. The definition of successful marriage is that both husband and wife should feel they got the best person in the world as their life partner. I believe we both feel so. Touch wood !

Another reason to treasure 2012: Since my wedding in 2007 till 2011, I have spent not more than a couple of months with my parents. But 2012 brought me ample chance to be with my parents for over 6 months and I'm not sure if I spent so much time with them exclusively even before my wedding. 2 months in India, 4 months in Canada  - totally with them around gave a breath of fresh air to my life, they took off so much pressure off me, showered that unconditional love towards us and apple of their eyes, their grandson. 6 months with in-laws has been such a relief as we had time to pick ourselves together to take care of the baby. Feb-Nov has been a life support for us with my parents or in-laws or both strongly holding us together.

India trip this year has been marvelous. Spending 2 months back home is luxury for most and thankfully we could get the most of it. Being with family of-course has been a pampering, spoiling affair, but meeting cousins and loved ones whom we haven't met since a long time or haven't met at all in few instances was memorable. The affection being showered is something which I could not forget or reciprocate enough.

Another big reason why I treasure 2012 is turn of events in my professional life. The day I landed in Canada in 2007, I made a promise to myself that I would make a mark in this new country where nobody knew me. All the life I spent in India, successes and failures were void then as I was going to start a new journey with new society, new set of people, new situations. Nobody in Canada had an inkling of who I was and what I was capable / incapable of.

SCL - these three letters carry utmost significance to my life in general and professional life in particular. That's the company which played a sheet anchor for me to reinvent myself, provided me an opportunity to prove my mettle, create a brand of myself. For the next 5 years I was a part of the enterprise, witnessed ups, downs, experienced the heat and benefits of entrepreneurship. This is a company which made me realize my forte, my dreams. I attribute the respect, image, status, success I experience today to SCL.

SCL for me was not just a profession. I loved my work and it's special because in earlier work-places I worked only because I felt it's my responsibility to deliver just because they were paying me. But with SCL, it's more of an emotional connect and I was motivated enough to put my blood and sweat, if I'm allowed this metaphor. My success was directly proportional to company's success and hence I was obsessive; days or nights didn't matter. Success did !

But every good thing has to come to an end and so did my fruitful association with SCL exactly after 5 years. 5 years is a long enough period in anybody's life and I take the baggage of all good memories with me. Cherish and respect forever !

My first independent entrepreneurship - CurveIT Consulting Inc (Canada) (www.curveitconsulting.com) has taken it's flight.

Golden rule of entrepreneurship: If you are good at something or if you have a dream, do it with passion and do it for yourself because if you do it for yourself, you will put in more than 100% of effort, and if it's your dream, the effort you put in would not look painful. I've believed and implemented this rule to the T.

Management consulting, public relations, advertising, branding - these are my favorite areas and pet ideas since MBA days; business analysis, program management are my areas of expertise; communication, mentoring, writing are my hobbies and forte that I've realized lately. I've mixed my interests, expertise, forte supported by my knowledge, education, soft skills, confidence, conviction, raw courage to see my dream taking shape.

Money is the last thing I started this venture for. The feeling that I'm doing what I like and I've turned my interest into business gives me that adrenalin rush. I could not have afforded to repent at later point of time that I spent a lifetime working in afield I don't like just to make few bucks.

Summing up - 2012 - has been a fabulous year with birth of my son, my entrepreneurial venture; gave me more family time, showered me more love, affection. I could not ask for more. Only aspects I missed were my social life, blogging, social media life and traveling. Now stepping into 2013 in anticipation of more love, more success, more happiness, more fun, more travels, stronger relationships and everything superlatively positive. Wish you all the same too. Love !

Daddy's Diaries - 2

Ever since my son entered our lives exactly 4 months ago, my life ceased to be the same. Now, I wake up in the morning to see his giggles; I defer my plans to see what dress he wears every day after shower, I wait patiently while he's been fed so I could take him in my arms, I aim to return from work early with a hope that he would recognize me and flashes a big smile as he always does; I wait for his playtime to take his videos, capture pictures, play with him with his favorite stuffed toys, look forward to hug him tight when he retires to bed and see his innocence once he slips into slumber. Life has been kind to me !

Before he was born, I used to get mad at all curious "elders" who wondered why weren't we planning for babies. I was clearly not ready as I was scared of losing personal space and "enjoyment". But it took us parents' concern, well-wishers' advices and society's "suspicions" to go for the big change. Looking back, I wonder, what enjoyment was I clinging to when the biggest enjoyment of life is through a little somebody who looks at me, smiles endearingly, holds my finger with his cutesy hands, tries to put it in his mouth :)

I knew a lot of doting mommies and daddies who never got tired of narrating anecdotes of their little ones' acts with unflinching enthusiasm; I thought I would never do that in order to spare my single or uninterested friends; I've been trying to maintain that but its so damn hard. How can anybody contain splurge of emotions, tsunami of happiness without sharing with their loved ones. Damn ! Respect to all those parents and I promise hereafter I would listen to all those stories with matching enthu...take my word !

Whenever I'm low, I just have to hold Bunty's hands and kiss on his cheek, he will scream with joy, always (and so will I); when he cries, I just have to take him into arms and show his favorite "Simba" soft toy, he instantly chuckles (but sometimes cries because simba didn't take him into its arms); he gets ecstatic when anybody hugs him tightly and kisses his cheek; he loves standing on his tiny feet when held and also takes baby steps on his parents and grand parents; he attentively listens to music and believes his mommy or papa were singing the song; makes faces after eating sour baby-food, poses to camera very well, enjoys drives but grunts when the car had to be stopped at traffic lights, enjoys evening strolls so that he could watch trees and squirrels; loves talking, loves company, loves display of affection....I can go on and on..

It's always heard, read that parents' love is supreme over everything else in the world. I'm experiencing that now. We tend to expect, if not demand, our parents, partners, friends, relatives etc to behave or respond to us in a certain way otherwise it affects the equation, which means those relationships are conditional to an extent. The only love which is and can be unconditional is parents' love towards children as parents turn, change, steer their lives and lifestyles so that their children are happy and comfortable. Now when I'm a dad and doing all this, this ain't sacrifice or anything noble, it's just my selfishness to see my son happy because his happiness automatically tunes happiness in me. That's love and that's a miracle. I'm experiencing the MIRACLE.

I beam with pride whenever a fleeting stranger compliments him as a handsome boy, feel so complete when he stops crying when I touch him. His confidence in my touch and care makes me feel like the strongest person on the planet. His mere presence in my life made me more matured, mellowed, responsible, secure and proud. He's 4 months old today.

I love / adore him is an understatement. Words can't always translate emotions. Wish my baby grows fast, interacts more so that his papa can show him his love, as he is left with no more words now. Can't wait, my boy !

Last 6 Months: Bliss with FAMILY

Last six months have made me undergo a complete paradigm shift in more than one ways. End of January saw me experiencing never before anxiety and anticipation because of many reasons. First because we (wifey and I) saw ultrasound pics of our baby, knew the gender, were planning for India visit after more than 3 years.We reached India on Feb 7th for a 2 month break.

India trip was hectic to the core. The first week was spent in recovering from jet-lag, preparations for baby shower ceremony scheduled within a week of arrival. Baby shower ceremony was the first event in our household (in India) after my marriage in 2007 and hence it was (is) extra special. I wanted the event to be memorable and thankfully it remained so for us, thanks to the well planned management by parents and good wishes of loved ones.

Next 45 days was a roller-coaster ride. Though I was prepared to experience culture shock, I was mildly disturbed by deteriorating respect for rules by the general public, increasing insecurity caused due to lot of negative factors. Things were not that bad some 5 years ago. But may be I should not comment when I can't do much about it. Also NRI's visiting India should come to terms that people out there are busy and those who were extremely lovable earlier could turn indifferent due to changes in lifestyles, priorities, complexes...That's life. We have to move on :)

But all these lows are more than compensated by family's love and their constant effort to keep me happy throughout. They are family after all, enough said :) they spoiled me badly with all they could pamper. And there were few friends, relatives who felt really happy to spend some quality time with me. Parties, functions, get togethers were much treasured. I cherish the India visit for one more reason - meeting few loved ones whom I only spoke with on web or voice earlier. Transforming virtual relationship into real one only added to more happiness, bonding which only grew thereafter. Two months passed leaving me asking for more. As said, no vacation is too long. We started back but the biggest solace was that my parents were accompanying us for Canada :)

We arrived to Canada on April 7th and since then we could hardly think or talk anything else not related to newborn-to-be. Next one month flew like a lightening with rendezvous with sister's family, visit to Pittsburgh, Niagara Falls and anticipation, anxiety about the baby-to-be. May 7, 2012 happened to be the eventful day when my baby entered into my life and my life ceased to be the same. Now I don't even remember how my life was before that little one shifted gears of my life :)

Last 3 months went with so much activity with my parents, in-laws around. Saharsh (Bunty - as we call our baby fondly) has been very lucky to have so much undivided attention, love, care from grand parents, parents, aunts who love him more than themselves. Every day we all woke up to see him smile, returned home with a hope to take him in our arms, tuned the way we live to keep him the happiest.

Personally my social life was reduced in priority to an extent while I was so busy basking in the luxury of spending as much time with my baby, parents, wife, in-laws that I felt everything else MUST take backseat. I can unassumingly claim this to be the best phase of my life till date, but in the same breath should confess that I have been away from those who love to connect with me through blogs, FB, chats and other modes. Thanks and love to all those who have understood and been patiently waiting for me. I promise to get back and reconnect with them shortly.

For the last 6 months, I've been in the company of my parents and I subconsciously gained huge confidence and security levels. The longer I stay with them, the lesser I think about myself - and hence they are my de facto support system. Though I'm supposed to be old enough to be independent and stronger, today I feel weak in the knees and my heart already started melting because my parents are returning to India today. I don't think the departure will be easy, but I have to put a brave face.

I'm sure the baby is gonna miss his grandma's cuddles and grandpa's stories which he seems to enjoy endlessly. I so wish he realizes how lucky he's been all this while and what is he gonna miss from tomorrow. The nicer thing about the last 2 months was that the entire family (parents, in laws, us) was under one roof and hence more time to know or get closer to each other. When my in-laws said they would miss my parents hereafter, it shows the bond for sure. For my wife, my parents saw her through her pre-pregnancy diet, household chores, childbirth labour, post partum blues and baby care. So she is gonna miss them as much as I or baby do.

We can't thank my parents for what they did because it would be silly and stupid, we can't stop them from going back because they have to move on in their lives. We can just say we love them as much as we love ourselves. Now we only wish that Bunty baby does some magic and pulls his grand parents to settle with us for good. Fingers crossed !

Daddy's Diaries - 1

Ever since my bachpan I always wondered why people (in movies and real world as well) get ecstatic, excited when a little one is born. It took over 2 days to come to terms, sink in a feeling that I became a dad and that a certain little man arrived into this world taking my blood, genes and life into him. Aahhh !

It took me 32 years to understand what it takes to feel the world in your arms. That cosy embrace from a 2-day-old who looks into your eyes as if he's saying "I trust you, dad" - beats the biggest happiness and richest luxury. That's just worth a lifetime of waiting.

Since the time my wife got pregnant, we and the entire family were curious about how he would look, behave, whose looks and features he would inherit and we were desperate to skip few weeks to see the baby ourselves, if possible. May be the little one heard our inner voices, he didn't wait for too long as if he was prepared to get into our world of joy asap. May 07, 2012 - a day I can never take off my mind hereafter is the eventful day which arrived much in advance than the scheduled day. We rushed to hospital at 4:30 am and had our baby before our eyes at 9:44 pm.

The moment the little one arrived, we both went blank, we could neither think or feel anything. Hema didn't say a word for 15 mins as she was in trance and I didn't know what to say or how to react. It took an entire battery of doctors, nurses, staff congratulating us and few drops of tears to shrug off the statue mode to meet our destiny.

Honestly, that day I was happier and relieved that my wife came out of the process unscathed. Though I know every woman goes through this pain to deliver a baby, I had a tough time seeing my wife go through that hardship. I'm not a hospital person but here I was made to hold my wife and assist in delivering a baby in the birthing suite. Man, that was not easy, but it made me realize what a woman goes through to bring happiness into the family. Internet sources say that a human body can bear only upto 45 Del (unit) of pain but at the time of childbirth, a woman feels upto 57 Del of pain which is similar to 20 bones getting fractured at a time. My wife experienced this pain without any epidural or pain killer.

After her months of pregnancy, controlled diet, weight issues, and many common fetus / baby related precautions, measures, medicines and finally this childbirth trauma, I'm here reaping the benefits :) Now I began to love, respect my wife and mother even more. I don't think they can ask for a better gift on Mother's day which is around the corner :)

My dad was beaming with pride that somebody was here to take his lineage on :) and my mom who was with me in the labor room for a while was uncontrollably ecstatic at the first sight of her grand-son. They both helped me shift gears from labor-room stress to childbirth excitement. My in-laws, sister were sounding overwhelmingly happy and desperate to see the baby. But I didn't dare to take my son into arms as yet.

As of then calls, messages, best wishes started pouring in from all ends but I was unable to come out to normalcy by then. The hospital staff who were cordial, caring and very polite comforted me and my wife with their genuine glee. They had the policy to address newborn's parents as mom and dad and some 10-20 people among the staff addressed me as "dad" which rather helped me stand on my feet and accept the pleasant reality that YAYYYYY, I'M A DAD ! The kind of treatment (both medical and human) by the hospital staff was so congenial that we felt completely at home and we're glad that our boy's born there among positive vibes. Will be thankful to them, forever for whatever they have done to us.

The next day was a bit different as I woke up from a slumber and realized what my priority should be - yes, my baby, my son ! Everytime I saw him move, cry, yawn, sneeze, frown (which he's now popular for) - some unknown spark was passing through me. I simply can't explain that in words.

Last night (a couple of hours ago), a nurse helped me in holding the baby.....Initially I wanted to hold only for few minutes till he cries for milk or something. As soon as he came into my arms, he opened his eyes wide and sported an expression as if he understood everything I spoke. I had been speaking to him when he was in his mommy dearest tummy. May be he recognized the ever familiar voice (or may be that's what I feel to keep myself happy :)). I SPOKE TO HIM FOR 45 MINS FLAT and he listened to me with eyes wide open, looking into my eyes with frowns, expressions and mouth agape. All that I told him was how much I waited for that moment, how much he meant to me, what were the moments I was waiting for in future, what should he call me and ended the conversation with a couple of lullabies after which he promptly slipped into sleep :)

Now the feeling sunk in, the bonding started. In hardly 48 hours, I felt mellowed down and the world started looking much more beautiful, happening and exciting. It was not just a childbirth but also birth of a dad. And the baby better know that his dad can do any damn thing to keep his life happy...and I meant ANYTHING. As of now, I'm waiting to change his diapers, feed him, comfort him when he cries, take him for evening strolls and make myself his addiction and him mine.

Incidentally tomorrow (May 11th) is our 5th marriage anniversary and we were earlier planning for something big, but now something so big happened that everything needs to just wait :D We don't need a bigger gift for our anniversary, my wife can't ask for a better way to celebrate her first ever mother's day on May 13th. My sister's anniversary (May 14th) and parents' anniversary (May 16th) are now more special thanks to Mr. Little Someone.

Last but not the least, I felt overwhelmed with the kind of best wishes and greetings I received from loved ones who visited us in the hospital, wished us on phone, email, text messages, facebook and other media. I believe the positive vibrations and cheerful glee brought by such genuine and affectionate wishes make our happy moments even more special. I promise I'll reply to each one of them and will share pictures of the baby very soon. Since it was an early birth, doctors suggested us to keep the baby under observation for few days. We are waiting for that observation period to end to take good pictures. But let me tell you there are polarized opinions about whom he looks more like :)

Regarding the name, we again have polarized opinions but we're sure, we'll reach to a unanimous choice by this mother's day and his mom will announce the name. Thanks to all those who showed interest in knowing his name but a 2-day wait won't be too long :)

Finally, a request to all my well-wishers, friends, family, cousins and loved ones: please bestow your blessings on our little one that he should lead a very happy, successful, lovable life ahead; he needs those blessings for a peaceful life and to ward off all buri nazar without trace; and also wish me and my wife a very good luck in this new journey. Your good wishes and blessings mean a lot.

With Love

My Misadventures Part - 4: Aimless at Amalapuram

Here is the fourth part of my misadventure series after previous posts

My Misadventures Part 1: Mumbai Masala
My Misadventures Part 2,3: Homeless at Anantapur, Kitchener

My Misadventures Part - 4: Aimless at Amalapuram

This happened in the first year of my working career (2004-2005). The incident was not as traumatic or painful as misadventures narrated in previous posts but if anybody asks me what could be the most aimless or worthless day of my life for which I have taken disproportionate efforts, this incident wins hands down.

I was in in my initial days of corporate career with a software company in Hyderabad. Soon I realized how important it was to keep my boss and senior members of the team in good spirits and be in their good books. One senior member of the team who was my virtual boss was getting married in a hamlet near Amalapuram, a small coastal Andhra town.

Few days before the groom-guy took off from work, I had a small misunderstanding with him which was blown out of proportion and I was in damage control mode; hence missing his wedding would be tantamount to inviting his ire which I could not afford at that point. I planned well in advance to join my other team members to travel to Amalapuram the day before his D day. But due to some last minute obligations, I ran out of time and as a result, missed the train. It was some 7 pm and his wedding would be at 8 pm the following day.

The first thing I did from the railway station that night (after missing the train) was to call my friend to locate where exactly Amalapuram was in the map of AP. My first mistake was to depend on that person to guide me because (1) she doesn't know a.b.c of AP as she was a northie, (2) she was realllllly bad at maps.

After some on-call support from me, I could elicit information that Amalapuram was near a town called Rajahmundry (which I heard a lot in Telugu movies and literature- thats my only connection). I asked the station enquiry desk as how I could go to Rajahmundry with a noble intention of traveling all night. He disappointed me with a news that the earliest train I could catch would be next morning at 6 am and I would reach Rajahmundry at 4'ish pm the same evening.

Nothing else to do, I reached home, asked my friend to pick me up next morning at 5 am and drop me at Secunderabad station which he did, thankfully ! The train was east coast express which was going Calcutta bound. I didn't know why I always happen to be in in such situations (refer to my Mumbai masala misadventure); I had to find some place in the general compartment. I ran like PT Usha to find the general compartment, but all that I could see were some desperate (more than me) souls hurling abuses at each other to reserve a slot to stand in the compartment; and it was a long 10 hour journey !

I, as an embodiment of foolish optimism, tried to find some place in reserved compartments (again with my Mumbai travel experience), but was literally thrashed out by ticket collector who didn't pay a heed or heck to my puppy face. Then I had to go back to the general compartment. Good news: All those who were on the platform fighting to get in, got into the general compartment; Bad news: I had no place except on the foot-board and heck it was a superfast inter-city express. I almost lost hopes and decided to go back home. But again the wilful laugh of the groom appeared before my face and I took no time to stand on the foot-board of that express.

Though foot-boarding in buses was OK, the same on train was a heck of an experience !!! The only solace was that train never encountered speed-bumps or sudden brakes. The foot-boarding experience was more tricky because I was feeling sleepy in that breeze (remember it was 6 am). This whole drama went on for almost 2 hours till the train reached Warangal (yayyy, my place) !

The toughest and most important goal of my lifetime at that moment was to get promoted from foot-board to the walking aisle of the compartment. I applied all my senses and concentration to barge in as soon as the last passenger got off at Warangal and hurray, this time, I had a luxury of standing near the wash basin (which was at its worst situation, smell, look and feel) in the compartment. But suddenly I remembered the saying "beggars can't be choosers" and in that situation I literally felt like a beggar.

The next notable station was Vijayawada, some 4-5 hours from Warangal. I spent that time sleeping while standing (and snoring - as was complained by co-passenger. I felt so thrilled because till then I never got that "compliment"). Whenever I opened my eyes, there was a guy who was narrating stories of his enemies, rayalaseema faction stories, his account of escapades from people chasing with sickles and swords. I thought snoring was a better alternative to hearing his bravado.

Vijayawada arrived. I disembarked myself hunting for some edible food. Finally found some chips packet as a consolation as I could not afford to go to another platform in pursuit of happyness. Hunger was better than missing train again. Otherwise my story would have been worse than Kareena's of Jab We Met, I happily got into the train and found a good samaritan who generously allowed me to sit on his suitcase (with its locks, chains, handles). Sitting on that was a pain in the ass..yup, literally ! But again the proverb "something is better than nothing" appeared before me in bold letters; But what appeared in bolder letters was the railway station board of the next station which screamed "Guntur". Before I could realize, the samaritan enlightened me that at Vijayawada , the train's compartments gets divided into two different routes, one towards Rajahmundry and another towards Guntur and as usual I was on the wrong side.

Cursing myself and everybody who came my came, I caught another passenger train from Guntur to Rajahmundry which took its sweet own time, stopping at every house, lane and villa. By the time I reached the destination, it was some 6 pm. I had only 2 hours to reach the wedding venue whereas the travel time from Rajahmundry to Amalapuram was roughly some 2 hours. And then I had to go to that small hamlet from Analapuram. But since its only a social event, I could afford to go late.

I came out of the railway station and saw a little bustling area where people were talking, yelling in an accent which I heard time and again in movies. I felt like Gulliver (except the size) traveling to alien land. People were courteous and I didn't find any challenge in boarding Amalapuram bound RTC bus. I must admit that the travel route between Rajahmundry and Amalapuram was breathtaking with Godavari canals, lush greenery, plethora of coconut trees. I then realized why coastal Andhra was called granary of AP. Rich canvas and scenery drove away all my frustration and disgust.

The bus reached Amalapuram town at 8 pm. Now my next destination was to reach the marriage venue some 20 kms from there. So I inserted my hand into my bagpack to dig out the wedding card and EUREKA....I forgot to bring the wedding card. What a timing, it was !!!

Then I shrewdly tried to call all my team mates who would have been at the venue by then. Bad news: The area was out of cellular network. Some bygoner said I was too ambitious trying to call cellphones in an hamlet where roads and school was a luxury. Immediate thought: Why the hell was that guy getting married in a place where normal person could't reach; anyways, time was not enough for analysis and introspection. I moved on.

Then I called my mom and asked her to ransack my cupboard, find that wedding card and tell me the address. She asked me to call 5 mins later. I called her 5 mins later, 10 mins later and 15 mins later. Finally caught hold of her and she said, "ok write down". I sincerely borrowed a pen from some guy around, took a piece of paper to write down when my phone battery got discharged. Wow !!!!

I kept calling her from a public phone and finally caught her after some 20 mins and took the address. I showed the address to the bus depot manager who said I had to wait for 2 more hours for the next bus to that area. It was already 9 pm. Then I beckoned a sharing-auto (shared driver's seat along with three more guys) and finally reached the venue (bride's house) at 9:45 pm and was surprised to see a somewhat deserted look :-s

After pleading some 5-6 guys, I was fortunate enough to find a guy who presented me before "alludu garu". Yayyy, finally I saw that guy, wished him, presented him the gift I brought. My common sense told me that dinner was wrapped up long ago. He gently asked me if I had my dinner. I said yes, so as not to embarrass him and myself. He enlightened me that in villages there, its a custom to have dinner at around 6 pm and hence dinner preceded the event. Immediately he asked me if I would join my team mates who just left for Hyderabad in an SUV. OMG !!! How could I miss that luxury.

I bid him bye with a promise to catch those guys but it was too late till I realized that my battery discharged cellphone was just a play-toy in that remote area which could as well be used as an experimenting ground for aliens and Mars !

By then I was strong enough to accept the fact that my team mates would have already left and I was left to my adventure again. I took a sharing-bullock cart (some good samaritan again) to Amalapuram only to know that last bus to Rajahmundry already left. Then took a lorry ride till Rajahmundry, sharing-cab till Vijayawada and private bus till Hyderabad and by the time I reached Hyd, it was 6 am. The exact time when the misadventure started the previous day. So out of 24 hours, I was traveling for 23.5 hours (except that 10 mins with the groom) in express train, local passenger train, RTC bus, auto, bullock-cart, lorry, cab and a private bus.

Highlight: After a month, the groom came to work fresh from his honeymoon and asked me "dude, why didn't you come to my wedding. I think except you, everybody in the team made it, (showing me his group photo with team mates at his wedding) !"

A Tale of Five Cities

Warangal, Hyderabad, Kurnool, Bangalore & Toronto - for me, these names bring in a wave of memories, emotions, associations, love, nostalgia and a sense of belonging. These cities complete "Me". My association with these places in a nutshell:

Warangal: A person can go anywhere in the world but can't disown his birthplace. Warangal is intertwined with my life in a big way. That's the place where my roots lie; my parents were born and brought up there; I was born there; every anecdote I hear from my family since my childhood is invariably linked to the city. whenever I see my passport, it reminds me where I belong to; whenever news channels report anything about Warangal, a reflex action occurs regardless of how stupid or useless that news bite is; whenever anybody says good words about the city, an amusing happiness seeps in.

Ironically, I can literally count the number of days I lived in Warangal because I was just born there but was completely brought up in Hyderabad. In my childhood, 8 out of 10 families (5 paternal, 5 maternal) among my extended family lived in Warangal thus making it the only holiday spot or a getaway for me and my sister.

All my childhood summer vacation memories, bonding with cousins, train journeys, first hand experience of a rural milieu (my paternal grandparents lived in a village near Warangal city), witnessing my grandfather addressing village conflicts in his daily darbar, experiencing out-of-the-world respect from the entire village, being addressed "chinna panthulu" - these memories are injected deeply in blood and soul -to remain for life :)

Though my extended family moved to Hyderabad, there are many more relatives in Warangal. My parents and close relatives say there is our relatives' house in every street of the city at an average. When I visited Warangal to distribute wedding invitation cards, we visited around 40 households in a day; a Facebook group solely for my cousins (and a chain of their cousins) most of who belong to Warangal is 700+ strong :) This explains my social ties with the city :)

Hyderabad: If you ask my wife as what am I passionate and obsessive about, she replies "Hyderabad" without any hesitation. As said, once a Hyderabadi, always a Hyderabadi ! I'm a Hyderabadi by choice, chance and conviction. I think, behave, live like a pakka Hyderabadi so much that my orkut profile name says "Chandu Hyderabadi". Yes, I can replace my last name with Hyderabad. May be that's called IDENTITY.

The environment during childhood shapes a person but Hyderabad has been shaping up my attitude, behavior since the time I could remember (and earlier too). If I have to write about my love, experiences and association with Hyderabad, I should simply start writing my autobiography ;)

I wear my Hyderabadiness on my sleeves and the city runs in my blood. Enough said !

Kurnool: It often happens that we learn more about life when we are out of our comfort zone. Kurnool happened to me like a training center for life. 17 years of indulgence, whims and fancies were abruptly put to a pause when I moved to this city for my engineering (b'cos 4600 was too big a rank in EAMCET 1997 to bag admission in a good engineering college in Hyd). So initial few months were a unique blend of unlimited and unchecked freedom and emotional roller-coaster ride.

Being away from family was much more difficult than I was prepared for; I was missing friends, Hyderabad, love and affection while the entire world turned upside down to me. For the first time, I realized the need to take care of myself and build an attitude. There was nobody to guide, console, rectify. This environment gave me a golden opportunity of self realization which helped me get rid of my kiddish ways to give way to a more extrovert, practical and aggressive approach.

I don't know how my life would have been if I did my B.Tech in Hyderabad, but my stint in Kurnool has helped me mature in a big way. I slowly fell in love with the city, relished the exposure to a different milieu, culture, slang, attitude, ways of life. Four years in a place will automatically create some soft corner in the heart and I'm no exception. Now I take pride in my association with Kurnool and as in the case of Warangal, my reflex action works here too :) (Read: Remembering College Days)

Bangalore: Never in my life did I think, Bangalore would be one of the important places in my life. That was one of many other cities till I was 25, when my life swayed uncontrollably with advent of my girlfriend (now wife) in my life. When I proposed to her for the first time, she was working in Seoul, Korea and for the next 2 years she traveled between Bangalore and Seoul for every three months. So I had a chance to meet her once in three months. In those breaks, we made sure she traveled to Hyderabad and I went to Bangalore to spend as much time with each other as possible.

That phase is associated with so many sweet memories when Bangalore (and Hyderabad) witnessed our sweet nothings, blossoming love and romance. Bangalore was (is) so much like Hyderabad in terms of lifestyle and it didn't take time for me to relate myself with the city.

I got engaged, married in Bangalore and that made the city even more special :)

Toronto: If Warangal is my janmabhoomi, Hyderabad is my karmabhoomi, Toronto happens to be my dharmabhoomi (if this suits the rhyme :$). Toronto made an unimaginable, unfathomable difference to my life standards, lifestyle, career, image and what not.

Toronto is my first destination out of India. After studying, working and fooling around in India for 27 years, I got my first opportunity to expand my horizons in terms of career, knowledge and exposure. While I haven't done significantly more than what I did in India, returns were manifold. I'm blessed with opportunities, success, luck, good wishes, respect in such a way that today I feel I'm living a dream.

Toronto has bestowed me confidence and attitude that will drive my life in a different gear till the very end !

These five cities make my tale and hence I wrote this Tale of five cities !

From Boyhood to Manhood

When I was in my teens and early 20's. I thought anybody who crossed 25 was an oldie and now am 31 but I feel this is my prime-time :) Amidst all hectic schedules, hullabaloo and struggle for existence thingy, I found some time to ruminate over gradual transition and development of "me", my thought process, values and attitude towards life. This post is just a reflection of what I understood as my transition from boyhood to manhood.

At my current phase, I can clearly and unambiguously categorize my post teenage years as 19-23, 24-28, 29- present, as my opinion about world and myself witnessed a paradigm shift with age.

19-23 for me was, like in anybody's case, wild, volatile and unstable phase. I was a boy subconsciously trying to behave like a man. With newly found freedom, exposure to the world, situations demanding and teasing my decision making prowess - that was an age which forced me to defy all rules and norms of society; ironically that was the age when I didn't know much but aimed at taking over the world. It was sheer ambition and rage of fire in the belly.

Superficial knowledge and limited exposure combined with unlimited arrogance is a lethal combo but that combo conferred upon me this attitude which some people refer to as devil-may-care-attitude. The obvious set of traits like carelessness, negligence, headweight, irreverence, idiosyncrasy crept into my head. Though I don't like this kind of attitude in others, I unknowingly fell into the same bracket at that age. When I see kids of that age group behave similarly, I see my old self in them :)

With age comes knowledge and a tinge of knowledge was bestowed upon me in the next phase i.e., 24-28. This is usually an age of revelation and confusion and I see people belonging to this age group consider their younger lot as confused and ignorant while they themselves fall in those traits :) and that's quite normal; I was no exception.

I was expected to be more mature, responsible and take decisions which shape my life forever. Diplomacy, machiavellianism, chutzpah took the place of innocent arrogance. I thought I could manipulate anything in the world and impress anybody with my smartass attitude; Always tried to impress everybody around with whatever I could, tried to take undue credit for every damn thing that happened around me, resisted any kind of value addition or pieces of advice from elders and more experienced. That's where confusion started, but the other side of the coin is that transition in mindset was initiated.

24-28 is also an age where people get settled in terms of life partner and career. These are the biggest factors that could / can affect any damn person to get back on the right track and understand what "life" is. Anybody who has not settled in either of these will remain confused for sure and if it doesn't happen till late 20's, the situation will become psychologically and socially worse and the worst thing is they never realize the effects.

Life before marriage is like a flight on runway. Until it takes off, flight can't be considered operational. Marriage makes a person more responsible, wise and stable in every way possible. Balancing life, balancing feelings and respect towards parents, life partner, understanding their insecurities and providing the much needed support to loved ones will throw any person into altogether a different world. But this transition doesn't happen in a day. It takes months and years to completely get into the idea and understand technicalities. It only comes with experience and once you are a pro in this, life seems to be totally under control. This happened to me and I feel so much lucky that my parents and my wife made this transition smoother than what it would have been for most of the people. Read: Whom to choose between parents and life partner

24-28 is also the phase when we tend to understand the difference between a job and a career, money and job satisfaction, vulnerability and stability, importance to professional and personal lives and a lot more. The kind of exposure and situations around will make a person more mature and thoughtful. Again, I'm no exception.

In this way my 24-28 helped me, exposed me to lot more situations, pulled me out of my boyhood and kept me in a staging or transition stage before I could become a man. It was a confusing stage as I had to come out of the shell created in my early phase and understand the reality of the world.

29 - present for me is a golden age, perse. As mentioned earlier anybody above 25 was an oldie for me but I believe I got my senses and controls back only after 28 :) By then I knew what the world was, faced many dire situations, knew how to handle stress, pressure, could handle any kind of offensive. I am now mentally and emotionally stronger.

With age also comes wisdom and I believe am much wiser now. I again broke the shackles of manipulative attitude and understood how important it is to be loved and respected. Human values, principles, social responsibility have become vivid. Everything in life is as clear as crystal.

The difference in attitude was that in early 20's I didn't care what others thought about me, in mid 20's I tried to impress others with smartass knowledge and kickass attitude but now I realize that we just need to be ourselves and be expressive and people will automatically love you. Life has mellowed down and eccentricity has given way to thoughtfulness.

This is also a phase where for the first time, I got close to a lot of people who are either much elder to me or younger to me. This gave me a 360 degree view of how life is perceived by people of all ages at the same time. I could see how people 10-15 years elder to me defied all rules of age and are living a life of their comfort. They never took their age seriously and behaved the way their heart wanted. They now do everything which a 22 year old guy can do (except flirting and courting though :p). And guys and girls younger to me showed me how world is getting faster and ruthless. I see teenagers and young adults with awe and feel good when they share their knowledge, ideas, treat me with respect which I never did in their age :) I know the times are changing and it has encouraged me to keep up to the world.

Most of my hobbies, travel, extreme sports happened in this age. I started interacting with more people now than I did in my mid 20's. I'm getting more compliments and appreciation for what I do; I'm garnering more respect when I'm not trying hard. I am clear as how to deal with negativity and worthless people (Read: Dealing with Negativity), deal with failure (Read: Dealing with Failure), how to be happy (Read: Rules to be Happy). My family life has been blissful (touchwood) with the only concern that my parents are not with me (which will be addressed very soon though). My parents, wife, sister, brother in law, parents in law, sister in law love me unconditionally. My word is well respected among all my family members and they all know I love them and care for them. 

This phase of age witnessed my complete settlement in career. I have no insecurities or qualms about making money. I'm in a stage where I have gained knowledge, experience and right attitude to sustain myself; I'm more than satisfied with my work, I'm happy with the kind of educational background I have and the way I'm putting it to use as well. Am the happiest when more than 200 people approach me and say I'm in someway responsible for their career. Bliss !

So I'm wiser, more intelligent, more enterprising, happier, richer, respected, more secure than I ever was. In short I'm happy with how my life is going on and can definitely say that this is the best phase of my life compared to younger days. This is the reason I don't miss being a teenager or younger.  I know I'm a MAN now, not a boy anymore and I'M LOVING IT. I believe my life in coming years will change further and am all game to take it into my stride.

Extreme Sports - Experiences to remember

I'm an extreme sport freak and the very thought of such outdoor activities gives me adrenalin rush. I'm attempting to narrate few extreme sport experiences I had. Incidentally all my attempts in such outdoor activities started after I got married and my wife accompanied me in almost every sport :)

BTW, the below mentioned outdoor activities generically fall under extreme sports category in contrast with other sports, but none of these are as extreme as the name suggests :D

Rock Climbing:

My tryst with some kind of extreme sports was rock climbing (though not exactly as extreme). It was at Runway 9 where I shed my inhibitions to try this. It was a very exciting experience thanks to my confidence in the guy who wrapped all ropes and buckles around me. This was the only sport available near Hyderabad then apart from Go Karting (also at Runway 9).

River Crossing:

A real extreme sport. After wedding, we went to Manali (yes, as a part of honeymoon). Beas river originates near Manali and is one of the roughest rivers in India. The rocky terrain, huge rapids, deafening sound intimidates anybody. For a non-swimmer like me, crossing that river holding a rope was definitely an adventure. When I crossed half the river, the trainer guy lowered the rope and my feet touched the flowing river water which was dangerously cold (quite understandably - the temperature was -3 celsius and the water came from Himalayas). This was my first adventure sport in true terms.

Skiing:

Rohtang Pass is a mountain pass near Manali famous for blizzards and avalanches. We went there to enjoy the scenic beauty but couldn't resist wearing the ski gear and blades. That's incidentally the first time, I saw and touched snow. Skiing looks so easy in movies, but the technique to apply brakes to those thin, long blades on slippery snow was definitely not a child play. We tried for 2 hours before we could ski for 200 ms.

Second attempt of skiing was during last winter when our cousin traveled from NYC. That's at Blue Mountains, 2 hours from Toronto . We chose the beginners area to ski. The shoes given to us were heavier than us and walking with those on made us feel like astronauts :)

Once we were ready with skiing blades, we were taken uphill by the movator and we were supposed to ski downwards. All three of us (Hema, Karthik and myself) were ready to ski and I just thought to have a small drill before going for a long ski and hence started skiing and to my utter surprise and shock, the steep mountain took my downwards with unbelievable speed. I skied faster than a vehicle and when i tried to apply the brake by moving my ski blades in an angle, that didn't seem to work; my speed accelerated and I was sure an accident was in store. If I continued further, I would've definitely run into other people (including children) and injure them as well. So I prepared myself for the worst and jumped off the blades to start rolling on the steep mountain of snow.

I had my blades fixed to my feet, but I stumbled and rolled over the snow for almost 300 ms. Luckily nobody came in my way and I didn't hurt myself too. After I stood on my feet, the best scene to see my wife and cousin too struggling very hard to control their blades, hahahaha. Later I learnt the trick and then helped the other two as well. An hour of skiing later on the ground level was fun though. That was an excellent memory :)

Paragliding:

At Solang Valley near foothills of Himalayas, near Manali. First of a kind experience flying in open air with a parachute was breathtaking. The launch was all comfortable, but tension started only when I was about to land because I didn't know whether to run as soon as I land (just like getting down from a running bus) or stand still. I landed under that confusion and suffered a minute bruise. That was a memory to reckon with :)

Motorboating:

Not an extreme sport, per se. My sister and brother-in-law arrived from US for the first time after marriage and we decided to go for a one day picnic. All of us were saturated with Niagara and hence planned to go to Thousand Islands, a water sport area 3 hours away from Toronto.

We wanted to have some adventure and so rented a motor boat to drive on St.Lawrence river. The river is one of the longest, widest and fast flowing rivers which we didn't know earlier. The boat owner gave us a 5 min orientation explaining all controls and gave us the key. Only after we started did we realize that the river is too big and wide (double the width of Godavari at Bhadrchalam - Papikondalu area).

All four of us took turns to steer the driving wheel and all was well until jetskis around drove fast enough to create turbulence in the waters. Remember, my sister and I can't swim and incidentally my wife raised the gas, turned the steering frantically and that\s when I prepared myself for the worst to happen. Later we parked the boat at one of the islands (among 1000 islands), spent some time on the island, and drove back to destination unharmed. 4 hour motor-boating on the river was very exciting, scary and memorable.

Canoeing:

Canoeing is something which looks pretty normal, but the first experience was tiring and confusing. My friend and I started rowing from opposite ends of the canoe and we took a cool 30 mins to crack the technique before we set off the odyssey on french river, Ontario. Trouble began when somebody told us that there was a waterfall nearby which could be our final destination if we didn't row it to the shore properly. One hour of canoeing then was more than watching 10 horror and gory movies.

But later when we tried it at Southampton beach, that was pretty cool. I became a pro by then :)

Kayaking:

Fairly simple, but equally dangerous because one of our friends who came with us for camping capsized the kayak, abandoned it and swam safely to the shore. But what should I do (I can't swim) was the question I had on my mind for that 30 mins when I kayaked alone on Lake Huron.

Rafting:

Rafting on grand river with cousins Preetham and Saroja was rather cool, secure and enjoyable experience. We never came across any kind of dangerous or adventurous situation except that it was physically exhausting.

Gliding:

Again with Preetham and Saroja near African Safari, Hamilton, Canada. We were made to sit along with a pilot in a gliding plane which was towed by another plane with a rope. Once we were in the sky, the towing plane withdrew the rope leaving the glider plane to fly for some time before landing safely. It was not a very adventurous trip, but sitting on a front seat and flying in a glider plane was a good experience.

Tubing:

One of the most dangerous and on the edge experience I ever had. We went to Elora gorge where grand river flows. Tubing was a very enjoyable sport as recommended by many. Its all about floating on a tube (something like a tube in truck tyre). We were given life jackets and tubes and were directed to reach the river. To my surprise there was nobody at the river to push, help, guide, instruct, protect or teach. We were left to our destiny. When we reached the river, there were some 15 people, waiting to see if anybody tubes but nobody even remotely attempting to do it themselves.

My wife and I took the tubes to shores, sat in the tubes but didn't know how to kick-off. Before I could realize what was happening, my wife pushed my tube into the flowing waters. Taken aback I started flowing along the river and in some distance saw rapids and a slope. I held my breath, left my life to the mercy of life jacket and was prepared to fell off the tube for sure. But I saved myself by holding the tube tightly. There were 3 such rapids which I survived before getting down in shallow waters very far away.

That was enough for me and hence started walking back along the shore with the tube in my hand when suddenly a small girl was screaming for help. She fell off her tube and was flowing along with rough waters. I raised the hero in me and gave her a helping hand and was about to pull her. But destiny planned something else for me :)

The rough water pulled me and we both started flowing in the river. I had a life jacket and hence was floating but the river was fast enough to push me even before I could control or hold something. After this drama of rolling and flowing in the river, some good samaritan saved me and that gal :D.

I saw my wife tubing slowly after somebody else pushed her to give her the necessary kick-off. I don't think I will tube again :D

Canopy Walk:

We celebrated our second wedding anniversary at a forest resort called Haliburton Wildlife Reserve, a dense forest and an abode for wolves and bears. The adventure was to walk on a canopy, a narrow (1 foot) hanging bridge built between tree-tops in the dense forest amidst flowing river. We were given a lot of gear to put around our waist and were made to walk on that canopy for half a kilometer. Breathtaking visuals, adrenalin rush made the experience worth our time.

Jetskiing:

This is one sport which took my breath away, which made me skip heartbeats. Jetski, a waterbike is easy to operate but the first and only time I did that was in pacific ocean where waves almost submerged me. Jetski works well only when we raise the speed to max levels. If we jetski in lower speeds, waves of water will oscillate the jetski and there is a danger of capsizing.

Being a non-swimmer I could not dare to accelerate the bike and hence pacific waves troubled me a lot (and I had my wife sitting behind me). At one point, I stopped the jetski in mid waters and the situation became even more dangerous. But if I raised speeds, I was sure I will fall down into the ocean. Under this predicament, I raised the gas and made sure the jetski didn't capsize or submerge.

Now I want to do this in some lake or river where waves are not so intimidating.

Parasailing:

Not different from paragliding, except it being on the ocean. Once we were released into the sky, the view of Hawaii was awesome. Cool and enjoyable time spent on parasailing, but nothing adventurous or extreme about this.

Snorkeling:

If I have to choose an activity which I enjoyed the most, its snorkeling. We have done this at the best place in the planet, Hanauma Bay, Hawaii. Turquoise clear waters, abundant fish and corals, scenic beauty, its paradise in short. I enjoyed it more because this was the first place where I got an experience of swimming.

We were given snorkel gear (fins, eye gear, snorkels) and were asked to get into the ocean. Initially I was apprehensive and hence took my wife's support but once I caught the rhythm, there was no stopping. I swam across into deep waters too to see beautiful colorful fish. That was a lifetime experience for me.

Future Checklist:

Bungee Jumping: My longtime aim has been Bungee Jumping. I recently found a place called Great Canadian Bungee, 4 hours away from Toronto. Now there is no way I can stop myself from doing this. This summer, am bungee-ing :)

Sky Diving: Another extreme sport which can be done near Toronto. This summer..mostly yes !

Scuba Diving: Scuba or deep sea diving is very similar to snorkeling but at deeper seas with additional gear to breathe. This summer or next summer depending upon the places we visit.

Hang Gliding: Similar to paragliding. Will plan for it soon.

Snowmobiling: Coming winter, snowmobiling will be waiting for me. Pakka !

Will post another article, once am done with these sports :))

My Misadventures Part - 2,3: Homeless @ Anantapur; Kitchener

Preface: This is the second part of my misadventure saga which I started in My Misadventures Part - 1: Mumbai Masala

Misadventure 2: Anantapur, AP, India

It was 2001, the year I completed my bachelors from GPREC, Kurnool which is affiliated to SK University, Anantapur. Everybody was planning to go to Anantapur to obtain B.Tech certificate in May, 2001 but I couldn't join my friends due to prior commitments and hence planned to go in June. Since the planned day to go there was saturday, I forced my friend, a Kurnool localite to accompany me with a promise that we would return by saturday night.

All went well as planned. We reached the university (outskirts of Anantapur) at 9 am on saturday and started certification formalities which went on till 2 pm. We were asked by the staff to wait for some time till the controller of exams signs my certificate. We went to university cafetaria, had lunch and returned in 40 mins and started waiting for a call. 3:30 pm, 4: pm, 4:30 pm, 4:45 pm - nobody called despite my reminding the attendant every 10 minutes. I got worried because the next day was sunday and I would had to waste 2 more days in an alien city where I don't know anybody.

At 5 pm, I raised my voice against the kind of delay and brought this to the notice of a higher official who promptly followed up to see why was there a delay. Shock of the day -  The controller of exams who was supposed to sign the certificate left for the day earlier ( 2:30 pm) due to his personal reasons. My mind blocked, tongue tied, blood boiled, fist closed, frustration mounted...didn't know what to do :X

Anantapur to Kurnool was a 3 hour journey in APSRTC bus and traveling back and forth for a day sounded very boring and tiresome. Then the only option was to stay in Anantapur for entire sunday and come back on monday morning to SKU to get that stupid sign before I could take my certificate and travel back to Hyderabad.

I felt guilty to have brought my friend along with me and hence asked him to go back to Kurnool which he did after some dillydallying. I promised him that I would spend the remaining time somehow as its only one day. What I didn't know was that interval between saturday evening and monday morning would be a hell for me :)

Reason: There was some political rally or meet scheduled on sunday and people from all over rayalaseema districts were supposed to converge in the town and literally take Anantapur by storm. Hence all hotels, lodgings, rooms were booked well in advance.

As soon as my friend left for Kurnool, my eyes accidentally glanced through a local newspaper edition which bragged about the never before never after rally to be scheduled next day. Then I slipped away from the bus stand, approached the nearest lodging, asked if he has an AC room to hire for a day. I still remember his surprised expression when he said "ipudu yaada untai abbi roomsu, entha lekka ichinakoodka dorkaaavu" - means you can't find a room now even if you pay more. I tried my luck at few more hotels but in vain. Its already 7 pm. Squeezed myself into a C grade roadside food-joint, waited for 2 hours to get a table and chair. Somehow had my dinner.

The only place I knew in the town was Bus Station. Went there, tried to find some place to sit and spent time till 12 midnight, but it was getting too congested and packed. I felt I couldn't spend the whole night sitting in one position. Then I got to know that railway station is a stone-throw away. I took my bag, started walking to railway station through a narrow road. Amidst curious passers-by, I reached the rlwy station, purchased a platform ticket, went to second class waiting lounge, found a comfortable chair and slipped into slumber.

Just when I was about to get into a deep sleep, somebody patted me on my shoulder. Yes, that's a ticket collector. He asked me why was I in the lounge. I told I was waiting to receive my friend who was arriving from Vizag (thanks to railway platform announcements, I knew that a train from Vizag was supposed to come at 2 am). TC guy said ok and stayed back in that lounge. 2 am train arrived, TC was staring at me suggesting to leave then. I came out of the lounge, mingled among passengers, went out only to return after 20 mins to take another platform ticket which would be valid for 2 more hours. I also took care to know the next train arriving at 4 am. But it was a Tom and Jerry game between the TC and me for the whole night :(

Finally, it was dawn. Freshened up in waiting lounge and left the railway station for a looooong day to go. By then the town was buzzing with activity thanks to the political meet. Again my destination by default was the bus station :D..went there, ate some breakfast at the bus-stand joint, bought times of india newspaper, filmfare, sportstar and swathi magazines because those were supposed to be my company for the whole day.

Thankfully the previous day, Nepal king and royal family were massacred by their eccentric prince and newspaper had enough fodder for me. I spent till noon somehow and by that time, the newspaper and magazines were borrowed by people of all corners of the bus stand and I never bothered to get those back. A series of forced conversations with co-bus standers started who had all sorts of questions for me like "babu, chala sepati nundi choosthunna, ikkade unnav, em bus ekkali nuvvu ?", "babu, nuvvu edo badha lo unnav, naaku cheppu, badha thagguthadi" :O

Fed up of this unwanted attention and concern, I decided to make a move and see whats around. Humidity was crazy and temperature was boiling. I luckily found some internet center where I planned to spend some 2 hours. But to my horror, the computer there was infested with all XXX pop-ups and videos saved all over the desktop. Adding to my woes, all cubicles were closed and occupied by college going couples busy in their own world. I was the odd man out there and was looked upon as a disturbing agent :-| ..after spending half an hour and not even able to check my email, I shelled out some Rs 30 and thanked myself :)

2 pm, terrible heat, crazy population, nobody to talk, nothing to eat, nowhere to spend time, nothing to do, interfering and intruding co-passengers in bus stand - I wanted to vent the frustration which I did by shouting aloud in a public washroom until others who entered there saw me with disbelief and contempt :-|

At 6 pm, I checked all theaters around and found one movie which was worth watching "priyamaina neeku". I had to wait for 1 hour for a ticket for a movie released more than 3 months back only to find some place to stay for the next 3 hours. How pathetic. Was out by 10 pm, didn't dare to cool my heals for 2 more hours for dinner, rather lived on fruits etc and made my way for my night destination - railway station again :(

I thought that's the worst day I've seen until 2007- when another dreadful situation happened in Canada. Continued below

Misadventure 3: Kitchener, ON, Canada

I arrived to Canada in Aug 2007 and wanted to apply for permanent residence which supposedly needed IELTS score too. I booked for an exam slot in Toronto in Feb 2008 which got canceled due to snow storm and was rescheduled at a town called Kitchener which is some 100 kms from Toronto. It was severe winter. I spoke to a friend of mine who lived in Kitchener and he said I could stay at his place for that one day. I also asked other locals who said I could find some hotels around railway station.

Exam was on Saturday morning at University of Waterloo and I booked a Via rail from Toronto to Kitchener the previous evening so as to reach Kitchener at 8 pm (I didn't have car or G2 license then). After reaching Kitchener railway station, I called that friend who never answered. A slight disturbance kind of feeling crept in.

Then I came out of the station, walked around for a couple of kilometers on one direction. Found no trace of a hotel or any kind of temporary accomodation. I thought I was searching in the wrong direction. Then I caught hold of a pizza store, had pizza and asked the incharge if I could get an address of the nearest hotel, he said he didn't know any (weird !). Its already 10 pm, there was no activity, no buzz, only few stores far from one another and mostly auto repair centers, industrial equipment shops, small factories and  garages. I thought it was a safe bet to spend the night in that VIA rail station (thanks to my earlier experience in Anantapur). Everything went on fine till 11 pm. At 11 pm came an announcement that the station will be closed as the last train just departed. And the temperature outside was -15 Celsius (5 Fahrenheit), fresh from the snow-storm of earlier day.

I didn't know about dial services or any other ways of obtaining help in such situations as that was my first winter and never did I face such situation. Also it was 11 pm and was too late to call anybody in Toronto which was 2 hours away. Then I came to terms that's going to be a tough night for me.


11 pm, shivering chill factor, hills of snow all over, hostile ambiance, nobody to talk or direct to. I went back to the pizza store which was open till 12 pm. Once they displayed their closed board, I walked out in pursuit of some hotel. I walked for 4 kms (around 2.5 miles) on 4 sides of the railway station and all I found were industrial workshops, production machinery etc. That was depressing. I was panting in cold and couldn't afford to stay or sit anywhere on the road due to safety issues. I returned to the closed railway station and decided to spend the remaining night in the premises (a bench at the railway tracks). there was no provision to sleep on the bench as it was divided by arm rests (as seen in the adjacent picture - taken recently as a memory of that day :D). So I had to sit along in the open air only to get panicked by hoots of goods trains which pass by occasionally. After 3 am, it became exceedingly cold and hostile. I could not withstand the wind chill which could as well murder me if I stayed there for long.

I went to the main entrance area where I found an arch with a semi-covered pillar / wall (as seen in the pic). I chose that area as that wall could block cold winds blowing all over. So I sat there till 6 am. There was a public telephone in the vicinity and every now and then, people came to use that. If they saw me, they would have got panicked thinking I was some anti-social element and hence I had to hide myself..huh :)

At 6 am, I woke up from my sitting slumber with an expression of triumph as I knew the railway station would be opened at 6 am. I took my bag, reached the main door and saw opening timings as 6 am on every day, but 8:30 am on saturdays. Another 2.5 hours. That was so dejecting. I literally counted seconds till 8:30 when I rushed even before the station master realized that she opened the door. After freshening up, I asked her timings of train to Toronto. She calmly said "9 pm tonight".Kevvvvvvv...I was ready for another adventure that day.

Took a cab, reached the exam center, finished the exam and luckily found few Toronto bound guys who sympathized with my last night plight and offered to drop me to Toronto. Finally I reach home unscathed.

PS: After getting reasonably good score in IELTS and submitting it along with immigration application, I was told I didn't need that because I already crossed eligibility points without IELTS :-|

My Misadventures Part - 1: Mumbai Masala

My friend uploaded a pic in his Facebook wall which reminded me of few misadventures I faced. A funny account of rather not so pleasant days :)

Misadventure 1: Mumbai Masala

Year 2000: When I was in my final B.Tech in Kurnool, I happened to go to friend's house to chill. I knew he had GRE exam the next day and I thought I could share my two cents for his preparation. It was 2 pm. I just asked him to show his hall-ticket which he did. What I saw was "Exam time: 9 am, Location: Some exam center, Mumbai" kevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv... Yes, it was Mumbai indeed, which he didn't notice.

Flashback: During the application process, he filled his first preference as Kurnool, second as Hyderabad and third as Mumbai and submitted the application well in advance; overlooked the location on hall-ticket assuming that he would anyway get Kurnool as the exam center. Yeeeehahahahahaah :D

Flashpresent: Kurnool didn't have direct buses / trains to Mumbai. Options were to go to Hyd (4 hours away) and catch Mumbai bound train and reach exam center in Mumbai by 9 am next day - which was close to impossible as all trains from Hyd to Mumbai start before 6 pm. The other alternative was to catch a bus to Adoni (a border town between AP and karnataka) which is 2 hours away from Kurnool and catch Chennai - Mumbai express which stops at Adoni for a minute at around 4:15 pm.

There started a pakka project plan :). Aunty wanted me to accompany him and I joined the adventure. 2:15 pm was the time and if we caught a bus right then, we would reach Adoni at 4:15 pm and could catch the train which could drop us at Mumbai exactly at 8 am from where we had to search the exam center (neither of us knew Mumbai). So all we could do was to hope that the train to Mumbai was late at Adoni but reached early to Mumbai :)

We started at 2:20 pm, caught the bus from Kurnool bus station at 2:40 pm. Expected time of arrival at Adoni was 4:40 pm. We sat in the first row reserved for ladies (thankfully there were no many ladies to occupy all reserved seats). While the bus driver was taking his own sweet little time at every stop, we started getting friendly with him only to describe our situation after sometime. He was sweet enough to raise the speed above normal acceptable speed. Every minute was precious for us. Every green traffic signal was like a boon. After sometime the expected time of arrival became 4:20 pm when suddenly traffic jam struck us like a bolt of lightning. 10 mins wasted. The driver almost stood on the accelerator for us and finally we reached the place at 4:30 pm. But he dropped us at Adoni bus station and we didn't know how far was the railway station. Luckily an auto guy came to our rescue and we saw God in him :). he dropped at railway station in 10 mins and the by the time we reached there with a certain mad optimism, it was 4:40 and YES..train was late by half an hour :))

We took general compartment tickets and waited for the train. General compartment was so packed that we had to hang on the footboards till Mumbai :D..crazy...we sneaked into a reserved compartment and were walking all along the train for an hour before we found a couple of empty seats (seats to be occupied by passengers in later stops). Then my friend took out his GRE Barron's to study :X...LOL

Couple of hours later, passengers arrived and kicked us away. We again started roaming all over the train careful enough not to get caught by the TC but the moment came and he caught us. We had to shell out Rs.200 (yes, corruption) to stay back in those compartments. No place to sleep or atleast lie down until 4 in the morning. Upon arrival of Pune, we could not control ourselves; we laid down our bedsheets on the walkway and slipped into a extended power-nap until somebody kicked inadvertently at 7 am (when the train arrived into the outskirts of Mumbai).

Then we stood in the queue to brush our teeth and after that found some place to squeeze ourselves only to be subjects of 100 questions by a curious co-passenger. It was tougher than GRE though. Finally we stepped our feet in Mumbai nagari at 8:15 am. Exam was at 9 am, some 1 hour away from Dadar railway station and we didn't know a bit about the city.

We asked the questionnaire guy of the train as how to go to Andheri and he asked us to follow him which we did. He directed us to a local train and we reached Andheri in some 30 mins. 8:45 am. There we took a bus to the destination and produced a Rs 100 note for 2 tickets to Saki Naka. He said he didn't have change and kicked us out of the bus. Huh..then we took an auto rickshaw after some serious bargaining and reached the exam center by 9:10 (yes thats for GRE, a clock-racing exam).

My friend entered the center and then I got some time to think about food. I roamed around, saw the area, stared at pretty girls around, had some stupidest breakfast on the roadside which was the only place available in the walking distance, tried by best to read hindi numbers on local buses, tried to decipher marathi spoken by by-passers, went to police-station (that was the only place in the vicinity with some seating area). By then, my friend completed his exam, got a decent score for the hardships we faced.

Then the siteseeing bug bit us. We wanted to see Gateway of India, Juhu beach - only places we knew in Mumbai. We asked people around us for directions, started our discovery and reached Gateway of India after 2 hours of hardwork, had some lunch, took polaroid pics (saw that pic on my friend's FB wall today), and started for Juhu beach which is again a 2 hour journey from there. After spending an hour or so, an hour long journey to reach Dadar station to go back to Kurnool (Adoni). By the time we reached the train, general compartment was again packed. Ishtory shtarted againnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn...imagine how we spent next 15 hours :-|

PS: That guy never applied for US universities despite all the circus. Soon after, he appeared for GATE, got M.Tech admission in a good university and came to US on work visa much later :)

Coming soon in next parts:

Misadventure 2: How I spent 3 days and 2 nights on Anantapur streets, bus station, railway station without an accommodation.
Misadventure 3: How I spent a whole night outdoors in Canadian snowing winter at -15 celsius (5 Fahrenheit)