Marriage is a gamble, be it love or arranged. Teenage and young adults around early twenties are vulnerable to getting carried away by transient factors which may cost their lifetime of happiness. Liking somebody and being happy with them are completely different things which may not necessarily go hand in hand. While nobody can judge or advise whom to like, I made an attempt to suggest single girls what kind of guys can keep them happy and comfortable. Here goes the checklist to watch out for:
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- Possessiveness - Though it sounds fairly harmless, this can be a single major reason for hell on earth for girls. There is a difference between concern and possessiveness. If a guy breaches that line and steps over individual freedom, that can get on your nerve sooner or later. A control freak, misogynist, insecure, male chauvinist guy suffering from inferiority complex can be lethal for a healthy relationship. So even if you like a guy, see if he respects your freedom. If you believe you can deal or adjust with his possessiveness, you are being very naive. It's a huge no-go
- Decisive - No girl really feels comfortable with a guy who can't take decisions or relies on others for push. In years to come, he should be a head of your family, manage finances, society around, kids and many more. He should be mature enough to understand and analyze situations, assess options and take reasonable decisions on time. Again there is a difference between overconfidence and conviction which he should know.
- Responsibility & Security - Single reason for getting girls married to older guys is to make sure they are in safe hands. Doesn't always means body guarding or getting into brawls with street goons to save her honor. Nothing so filmy. But a guy who feels, expresses and maintains responsibility and takes care of his girl's physical, mental, emotional, social and biological needs, securities is a right guy.
- Attraction - Girl should marry a guy who adores her, treats her like a princess, feels lucky to have her around and takes pride in showing off his girl. Every girl is beautiful and will find a guy who goes crazy about her. You just have to wait and find him. Life becomes much more beautiful and romantic.
- Family connection - Marriage is an alliance of two families. No guy or girl can peacefully co-exist with their spouse who hates their parents; nuclear families are no exception. Get into relationship only if you strongly and positively believe you can get along with his parents and he doesn't build bridges between you and your parents. It takes compromises from both sides to get along with people of different backgrounds but if it clicks, it makes a lifetime of difference.
- Sense of humor - Though you don't need a standup comedian to tickle your funny bone all the time, check if the guy has some sense of humor. Life is too short to be seriously planning and panicking all the time. A guy who can make you laugh with even his silliest antics is worth it.
- Charming - When you get married to a guy, he's introduced to your world of friends, cousins, colleagues, relatives. Though it's not important to keep the society happy, it helps if your guy is charming enough to spell magic among your circles with his charm, wit, etiquette, choice of words, gestures and social behavior. Who wouldn't like compliments about her better half ? That would add spice and beauty to the relationship
- Expressive - Look for a guy who is expressive, who can show how much he loves you. That one quality will sweep you off your feet many times even after marriage.
- Monies - Though not absolutely necessary, life is better with luxuries than with paucity. As a saying goes, a successful husband is one who earns more than this wife could spend. A guy with good financial standing, potential to earn big can save you from a lot of gloom, inferiority complex, adjustments, compromises and agony. If you have a choice, opt for a richer guy. As simple as it goes.
- Looks - Not the most important, hence the last in the list. Just imagine your life where you wake up (and also go to bed) to a suave, athletic, TDH guy. Wouldn't life be beautiful ? Also he's gonna share his looks with your kids-to-be. So don't be in perennial denial that looks are immaterial.
So girls out there, run this checklist through a guy whom you fell in love with or your parents proposed to you. It's never too late until you tied the knot. And if you think this would help your loved ones, feel free to share !
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1 comment:
Well put.
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